Happy 5th Anniversary.
It is so terrible for us to be half a world apart. I miss him with every waking moment of my being... really, I really truly did not think I would miss him so much. It is painfully dizzying some days. I don't think anyone can really understand unless it has happened to them... to be separated in this way. My brain, my heart, even my skin has these weird ghost pains from him being so far from me.
The last five years have been an adventure, to say the least... we married and moved to Europe for three years, then moved back to California and went full steam ahead into becoming homeowners, dog-owner, and full-fledged, grown-up California residents. If this is just 5 years of being married, I cannot imagine what a lifetime will be like! But I am looking forward to it, with every bit of my being.
These last 5 months have been some of the toughest we have ever faced. And we have been apart before: when he joined the military and went to basic training and tech school, when I took TWO trips to California for about 6 weeks each time. He works 24 hour shifts every other day. We have had space between us. I am no stranger to sleeping alone many nights.
THIS, has been a challenge... a slow and painful challenge, and one I would prefer not to experience again. I like to think that we are challenged in life to bring a caliber of quality to our lives, as nothing worth having comes easily.... college is hard, but having an education will merit great things, right? Hardships don't always have to happen in relationships... and what I mean by that is that creating your own problems (cheating, fighting, abuse) doesn't count towards making yourselves stronger... but the really tough things in life that happen, such as separation, sickness, financial hard times, those are the things that will test the caliber and strength of your relationships. We made our mistakes in the past and suffered through those. These happenings in our lives as of recent: we have endured. And because we have endured successfully, I am hopeful for the future and that more great things are destined to come.
I love you Jorden Benjamin Innes. I always have. I always will. And we will be in close proximity soon... togetherness is not measured by mere physical distance, as hour hearts have fused by the fires of our love and we will always be together.
Year 1 - September 2007:
Amor Vincit Omnia... Love conquers all!
I love you, Jorden!!! Happy Anniversary and we will celebrate and celebrate and celebrate some more, when you return to California!!!!
Your beloved and only,
Vanessa I. Innes!!!!